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Tests!
Don't know squat about yourself? Want someone else to tell you a bunch of lies disguised as professional advice? Take the following tests to find out if you are REALLY what you think you are, or actually what I say you are!
Crazy Test:
1) While at school/work do you:
a: Sit quietly and work.
b: Talk to friends, and do a little work.
c: BBBRRRRRRRRRRR HEEE HOOOO AAAHAHAHAHAHAH WWEEEE WWEEEEE!
d: Stare listlessly out the window.
2) When you are with friends, do you spend most of your time:
a: Talking.
b: Watching movies.
c: HUBADAHHUBADAH WHOOSH UP UP AND AWAY I GOES HEHEHEH.
d: Listening.
3) Do you consider yourself:
a: Reserved.
b: Outgoing.
c: Crazy.(AWOOGAH CHUGGACHUGGACHUGGA PPHHTHBBT!)
d: Average.
4) If you were an animal, would you be:
a: A dog.
b: An eagle.
c: FSHOOM ENENENENENEN KABLOOIE! I'M A TREE! A TREE I SAY!
d: A fish.
Results: If you answered mainly :
a: You are not crazy.
b: You are not crazy.
c: You are crazy.
d: You are not crazy. But you are a fish. I'd have that checked.
Existence Test:
1) When you talk to people, do you find that:
a: They listen to your opinion with interest.
b: They listen to your opinion, and punch you afterwards.
c: They don't listen to your opinion, but don't walk through you either.
d: No sound emanates, no matter how hard you scream.
2) When you trip on a step, do you:
a: Whack your knee.
b: Whack your elbow.
c: Whack your shin.
d: Find that you are unaffected by gravity, and seem to hover, weightless, in the air.
3) When putting on pants, do you:
a: Put the left leg on first.
b: Put the right leg on first.
c: Put both legs on at the same time, resulting in you falling over and a laughtrack sounding.
d: You cannot put on the pants, as you have no hands with which manipulate them, no legs on which to put them, and no body in between.
4) When thinking, do you:
a: Find yourself in deep, painful thought.
b: Ponder at length on the nature of man.
c: Wonder at the sheer insignificance your life has on the affairs of the universe as a whole.
d: Not think, as you have no mind to do so with.
Results: If you answered mainly:
a: You exist.
b: You exist.
c: You exist.
d: You don't.*
"Are You Taking This Test"-Test:
1) Are you taking this test?:
a: Yes.
Results: Yes, you took this test.
Mind-Bogglingly Hard Test:
The answer to this test is:
a: b
b: c
c: d
d: a
Results:Kinda stupid, isn't it?
Deep Thinking Test:
1) Is there a correct answer to this test? Think about it:
a: -
b: -
c: -
d: -
2) This isn't a question. How can you answer it? Think about that:
a: -
b: -
c: -
d: -
4) What is correct? What is incorrect? Think about it:
a: -
b: -
c: -
d: -
4) Keep thinking:
a: -
b: -
c: -
d: Get bent.
Results:If you answered "d" to the last one, good for you.
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*So if you don't exist, how are you taking this test? Kinda mind blowing, eh "one-who-isn't?"
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